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Start Here
Here it is a few days out from Thanksgiving, sitting around and reading the news and stories with my morning coffee. Gratitude is a funny camper at times and as much as I went over in my mind of what I am thankful for, I must have missed a few rooms off of the heart. […]
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Me Too
Eventually I knew I would have to put some words down about this;… Correction, some emotions down on this. This is as personal as it gets, and it is raw and unfiltered as anything can be because there is no guide or plan to deal with this condition. The internet is abuzz with real allegations, […]
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The Hand Up Project – People Mean Something
The path led off of the sidewalk into the woods, garbage strewn everywhere, human waste could be the substance you step in instead of mud. Under a piece of plastic drug up from the piles a shivering teen girl, soaking wet from the constant downpour that has lasted for days; Sticks a tiny needle in […]
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Slow Walking Superman
Yes, there is a certain amounts of life that just happens, and there are certain amounts that you aspire to. When I was pulled over on that September night back in 2011, I was at my end of ends. My jig was up and the escapism and self destruction came down to a set of […]
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How Does it Feel?
A friend of mine brought up a good question, and one that parlays into what I am going through these days as well. While I will edit the wording, he asked “What does Un-F^&ked feel like? At first a skim over the senses and a properly witted response followed. The remembering my place in all […]
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Eminent Education
We have all heard the phrase before, “It’s for the children.” In the best intentions much is done with that refrain in mind. We are asked to vote on, and are taxed by, we support their extracurricular activities, and defend their rights to a fair and proper education. We even move when we are in […]
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The Stars to Guide Me
Once again in too short of order, another friend has joined those I pray to now instead of for. I still pray for him, it’s just different. There were five and now there is two, A rag tag bunch of brothers from other mother’s. As wildly different, and at the same time attached at the […]
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What Might Have Been
Well the school experiment is not going to work out it seems. The instructors are fine, and they teach a great class. Though the need to explain myself has one teacher thinking of them as simply excuses, and sometimes an eye roll. I am not going to apologize for this though, I am not going […]
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Life’s Reformatting
“How are you?” I was asked by my friend and sponsor this weekend. I was almost taken back by my reply as I was the realization I had at the same moment. “I am just great! My situation is dire, but I am great.” Pause… Did I just say that with perfect honesty and without […]
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At Apathy’s Gate
Yes, in the best of Sherlock Holmes inquiry, small insights often lead to larger pictures. Those little things that undo the biggest of plans and aspirations. It is those small insights, when they are noted again and again that the larger picture of us comes into a clearer light. The clues we leave on the […]
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A Massacre, A Flag, and A People.
Like many of you here, I awoke to the news of the massacre in Las Vegas with bleary eyes and a more than heavy heart. The effect that it had on me was one all too familiar to this caring soul, and the afterthought one that was done out of self preservation. I closed up, […]
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Not Falling for Winter Again
It is October now, and Fall has set in around these parts. The rain and winds have returned and the falling leaves and needles frustrate even the most patient of us cleaners. The darkness lasts a little longer each morning and comes a little sooner each night. The life we lived so much of outside […]
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Conundrum
Well, in my first week of school and a job that both started on the 18th, I have a huge infection burst open and toxify my experience for awhile. I am going to have bouts like this of Diverticulitis, but this time it just hit me all at once, little warning though, I probably would […]
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Fall Change
So I am back at this blog, the other one is too chaotic and busy. I thought I would have this one done by now, oh well. I started going to school to finish up some education. My plan was to keep going and possibly get a masters in something and go from there. I […]
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The Din and Brilliance
In this time of deep examination of not just myself but of my environs, the natural tendency I have to go into the existential aspects of things come out. Like a drunk trying to stand upright with a VR headset and Riding the Roller Coaster app; It can be fun, it can upset my stomach; […]